She came to me in a dream.
Being pregnant with her was not a dream.
I went into heart failure at 34 weeks, and hung out in the hospital until it was safe for her to come out.
When they wheeled me from my room to the operating room, it was a scene out of one of those horrible ER episodes, where you don't know if you want to keep watching b/c the ending seems tragic. I could hear her heartbeat on the monitor as they were rushing me over...loud, and slower....slower...slower.
I put my right hand up in the air, and yanked some tubing around w/ it. The anesthesiologist pushing me the fastest said "Put your hand down." I said "No."
I'm giving her up to God. It won't matter if she comes to me or not, but it matters if she goes to Him. I never felt as much faith as I did in that moment. And never have again since then.
It's amazing the things that faith teaches a person, and the humility that comes w/ that.
She will be two years old this year, and is a constant reminder of the simple nature of faith and to be thankful despite the noise.
Peace.
She is beautiful and your post made me cry! Hang in there, you are doing awesome!
ReplyDeleteI follow you on twitter @momentbymoment1 is my username. my daughter was born at 27weeks gestation and I feel your post. check out my website and read our story http://www.momentbymoment.com.au/content/blogsection/18/62/
ReplyDeletewe also had it featured in a magazine here in Australia so I hope it reminds others of how greatful they should be.
The story was called So Tiny So Precious - check out the media button on my website
take care xxx
She definitely is an angel. Couldn't be happier for the proud mommy too. :)
ReplyDeleteShe's beautiful. :)
ReplyDelete